Random thoughts Stray memories

Sunday, June 30, 2002

"No" is the wildest word in the English language.
- Emily Dickinson

Saturday, June 29, 2002

I won't remember unless that gives me a scar.
- Quest, a whimsical remark on remembrance

What I learnt while googling. Michael Haneke who directed the movie La Pianiste, also directed the movie Funny Games, a story of two young men who intrude on a vacationing family and soon subject them to all manner of humiliation. I thought the former was brilliant (but not enough to convert me into a classical music lover), while the latter had been described by someone to me as the most meaningless movie he's seen. Hmm.

What I learnt while drinking with the guys just now. zarchon9 remembers strange CD compilations like one by 4AD, entitled All Virgos are Mad. And though I've discussed religion with different folks before, it's only Yoyo who mentions Dante's concept of Heaven and Hell as well as Buddha in the same breath. That in an issue of the comic Sandman: the Devil decided to take a vacation and passed Sandman the key to Hell; which Sandman wasn't really enthusiastic about; and God sent 2 angels down to take the key and look after Hell instead. That the tip of my little finger doesn't reach the first joint of its adjacent finger: which means I won't be able to make it no matter how hard I try (alas the knowledge comes too late). That Schubert as a classical composer is difficult to interpret.

Friday, June 28, 2002

A colleague just lent me money. I don't need to go home yet. Woohoo! :)

Last night I switched bags to bring to work since today's casual Friday. I remembered my Discman, tissues, mobile phone, umbrella, Ezlink card, book, Palm V and things to return to other folks... and I forgot my wallet. Now I'm at work without my wallet and the only way is to go home for it during lunchbreak. Urgh. Talk about carelessness. TGIF.

Thursday, June 27, 2002

My haul from the mobile bookfair during lunchbreak:
- Lucinda Rosenfeld's What She Saw. Well, actually the full title is What She Saw in Roger Mancuso, Guenter Hopstock, Jason Barry Gold, Spitty Clark, Jack Geezo, Humphrey Fung, Claude Duvet, Bruce Bledstone, Kevin McFeeley, Arnold Allen, Pablo Miles, Anonymous 1-4, Nobody 5-8, Neil Shmertz and Bo Pierce. So if you know me by now, you'll have guessed about what I saw in this book.

- Bret Easton Ellis' The Informers. The second book I own from him; the first being Less than Zero (which I've read). He's the one who wrote American Psycho, and I would have bought that while feeling bored during transit in Zurich, 'cept it would have been too depressing to read on such a long flight.

- Tracy Kidder's Hometown. The third book I own from him; the others being Soul of a new Machine (from a previous mobile bookfair) and House (from Borders). Both have so far remained unread by me.

To be frank, I think I can remember more books than I do people.

A book on Lost Pet Posters. Intriguing.

In my books, having someone's name card doesn't equate to having met him/ her. It only means I could have swiped the name card from those huge glass bowls at restaurant counters.

Wednesday, June 26, 2002

I find it unsatisfactory to identify songs only by their track numbers while listening to my Discman, but can't be bothered to carry the CD jewel cases too. So to check the track listing, I've taken to copying the track listing out on cue cards to bring around instead. I guess Discmans which list tracks by song titles already exist?

Useless thought of today. I thought it'd be interesting to create a gigantic index of every album title and even better, every song title from all the albums I own or have listened to. One thing that fascinates me is song titles which bear no connection to the songs themselves, like someone just threw a handful of phrases into a hat and random picked them to be song titles.

Godel's Incompleteness Theorem as explained by Whatis.com:

The First Incompleteness Theorem states that any contradiction-free rendition of number theory (a branch of mathematics dealing with the nature and behavior of numbers and number systems) contains propositions that cannot be proven either true or false on the basis of its own postulates.

The Second Incompleteness Theorem states that if a theory of numbers is contradiction-free, then this fact cannot be proven with common reasoning methods.

Last night while watching the World Cup match at home, I stunned my mum when I yelled out a loud vehement heartfelt "NO!" when it looked like Korea might score. Then she started worrying about my conduct while watching World cup matches in public places. Eh, too late mum. :)

Tuesday, June 25, 2002

Frankly I'm glad Germany beat Korea. I don't see why being Asian should automatically make me Korea's fan. Granted that the Germans didn't play their best in this match and threw away lots of opportunities to score, I still think they're the underdogs who remained undaunted among all those Korean supporters. Plus the fact that referees so far tend to favour the Korean team unfairly, made me will the German team all the more to win. Not that they have any real hope against Brazil, and I have no doubt it will be Brazil they meet in the finals.

Chase left a comment on my post about drawing a moustache on the Mona Lisa, but I figure I don't know any Chase (besides the Chase Manhattan bank). So I went to his blog and found that he's a friend of Electrin's, and came across this bit about the Blogathon. Which I found amazing cos sometimes it's hard to blog at all, not to say every 30 minutes interval for 24 hours at a go. But you have my blessings Chase. :)

I don't know what's going on. Sometimes I just want to focus on the small things, like will I be able to finish reading the library book before its due date next week; what I want to do this weekend etc. Just lean back and close my eyes against the hot sun, thinking about nothing at all.

I support Germany but emotionally attached to Korea.
- what a friend wrote about tonight's World Cup match [Germany vs Korea]

The brain and heart disagree again.

Happy belated birthday to my Chicago friend, who's going to be on an enviable backpacking trip to Spain next month. Have fun you :)

zarchon9 just provided an interesting titbit on how someone wrote 3 albums about a breakup with a girl.

Monday, June 24, 2002

If you bought the Mona Lisa... you could draw a moustache on it.
- Len Rubin, attorney at Gordon & Glickson, on whether it is legal for music lovers to circumvent an anti-copying technology used by Sony Music Entertainment on music CDs. (They do this by drawing straight lines on the protected CDs with felt-tipped markers).

Parody script of Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones which my ex-colleague in Poland sent me. Damn hilarious!

I've just finished reading my 26th book this year last night, excluding all the magazines and abandoned books. This is actually twice the number of books I've read last year (all-time record low) so I guess I've redeemed myself. Watched more than 60 movies this year already too, as compared to 70+ movies for the whole of last year. Of cos this means I've slacked in other areas, like editing my tour video clips for example. Like M says, it's Procrastination.

Sunday, June 23, 2002

Well if I had a child
what a child it would be
never have to bathe
have sweets every meal
wear their favourite clothes everyday
and go to bed when they want to
have jellybeans for breakfast
and run free wherever they please
If I had a child
what a child it would be
You see them play in the flowers shade
Pluck 'em apples off the trees

If I had a child
it would be the child God made

- Dusted's song If I had a child

Whimsical lyrics set to the saddest, most soulful piano jazz tune. Not something I'd expect from Rollo, who also belonged to the dancey Faithless. Nearly one year after I've posted about the Dusted album, I've finally bought it. Delayed gratification is still sweet.

Bought a cheap and cute Super Battle Droid kids' T-shirt today based on Star Wars' Attack of the Clones. Not the sort of thing to buy at my age, and definitely not when out shopping with my mum. I shuffled out of the shop without buying it at first, but my mum knew me better than that and predicted I would go home with it anyway. So I did. :)

My mum is awesome cos she can wield a chopping knife to open durians while I look on wimpily. If it's up to me, I'll buy those already opened, whether they're fresh or not.

I like Chupa Chups with beer, especially when the core of the Chupa Chup is a wad of chewing gum.

Saturday, June 22, 2002

Went to Dave's place to watch the Germany vs USA match (quite a letdown really). Afterwards, we got to watch the movie Reservoir Dogs. I remembered reading the entire script off the internet one lunch break a couple of years back, but the only fragments I could recall upon watching the movie was the discussion on Madonna's song Like a Virgin. We had a minor disagreement about whether we wanted subtitles or not, cos logically we didn't need them since the dialogue and the subtitles were both in English, but it was hard going catching everything without them. Well M and I voted for subtitles, my best friend voted against, Dave's seen the movie before, and the rest weren't bothered... so the subtitles stayed. :) And I magpied some more issues of New Yorker from Dave! Happy happy joy joy!

Friday, June 21, 2002

I touch stars.
- the refrain in Orbital's song Funny Break (One is Enough) and what's playing on auto-repeat this morning as I buzz happily to work. Ethereal female vocals over swirling beats; half day at work; and 2 World Cup matches with friends. It's more than enough.

Thursday, June 20, 2002

The little girl turned to the man expectantly and demanded, "I need a story, tell me one please!"
He smiled indulgently, "You always want stories. What will you like?"
And she answered, "A happy ending!"
He closed his eyes and thought a while, looking a bit serious when he answered her. "This is going to be difficult. I will then tell you a story of negation, a fairy tale of what wouldn't happen. You would learn to swim and climb trees from me. You would keep every friend you made in primary school. You would grow up and find a job that really made a difference. A boy would ask you to stay for him, and you would. You would always be happy. You would be there to hold my hand when I finally take my leave."
She went all quiet.
"What would really happen?" she finally asked.
And he replied, "You would grow up behind everyone else, make mistakes and try to learn somehow. You would be petty, average and common, but I would love you anyway. You would miss me sometimes, and one day imagine we had this conversation".

While I was on the bus home, my UK travel mate sms'd me: Sitting behind a chinese guy who speaks with an american accent. And he speaks real loud. buay tahan. How i wish you are here for me to speak loudly to. Oddly amused, I replied that I have an accent too. And the woman replied: That is why i wish you are here. Your accent is much better. His is fake. Eh, thanks. I think.

Incidentally we both boarded the same numbered bus headed in the same direction, just about 15 minutes apart.

Some people are more toxic than others.

Learn to be free of the good opinion of others.
- Abraham Maslow

I have no illusions that my books, movies and music will bring world peace or make it a better place to live in. Of cos not. But I'm no good without them, and I don't want to feel apologetic about loving them. If I catch some flak cos of these oddballs, it's a small price to pay isn't it? Or so I tell myself.

Wednesday, June 19, 2002

What does the Star Wars movie Phantom Menace and this Friday's World Cup match between England and Brazil have in common? I've taken leave to watch the former and I'm going to do the same for the latter. Actually, I'm not as bothered about who's winning this World Cup as I am about this match.

The office light above my desk is flickering madly and I've problems focusing on my laptop screen before the maintenance people come fix it. But it's far from the end of the world isn't it? :)

Tuesday, June 18, 2002

Just previewed the movie Bad Company, an action flick starring the unlikely pair of Anthony Hopkins and Chris Rock. Half the movie was shot in Prague, and it was surreal not only cos I was in Prague just less than 2 weeks back, but cos there were no tourists in the movie. The Prague I know is swarming with them.

Things you can't tell from looking at me this morning.
1. I have a sleep debt which I haven't repaid over the weekend, so my senses threaten to overwhelm me at any moment. But I'm not considering caffeine induced wakefulness. Well, not yet.
2. I've just received my last mail-ordered issue of Uncut and decided not to renew my subscription. I'll rather buy my CDs normally without them being delivered with cracks in the CD jewel cases.
3. I'm also wondering what the lyrics are in the Morcheeba and Kurt Wagner collaboration entitled What New York couples Fight about. I can't tell just by listening to the song, but isn't it the same as what couples everywhere in the world fight about?
4. I'm looking forward to watching soccer this weekend. :)

If my body were a customer waiting to be served at a restaurant, my mind would be that snotty rude and superior waiter who goes anywhere but near this customer. The customer would be dying for food and wave frantically to be noticed, and the waiter would be thinking "Got more important things to do, and looks like this bugger isn't much of a tipper." As a result, the customer would be so hungry he got up and keeled over, and get the waiter's attention finally. I guess I have to take care to notice when the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak et cetera.

Monday, June 17, 2002

While trying to explain about glocalization (or the globalization of a product by adapting it specifically to the locality or culture it is marketed in), the first analogy that comes to my mind is actually Chinese food. It's like this: Chinese food is available virtually anywhere in the world, but how it actually tastes like depends on where you're eating it. The only thing that doesn't change is probably the restaurant names that include words like "dragon", "phoenix", "fortune" or "happiness".

There are times when we must sink to the bottom of our misery to understand truth, just as we must descend to the bottom of a well to see the stars in broad daylight.
- Vaclav Havel

Yoko Ono is bringing a collection of John Lennon's art drawings on tour and there's an exhibition here. The girls and I went to see it and one drawing caught my attention. It's a self-sketch by John Lennon in 1979 entitled Nothing is Impossible and the explanation accompanying the drawing starts with "John is so happy...". The strange thing is in the drawing, John Lennon has a distinctively downturned mouth and by no means did he look happy. I just don't understand how the happy interpretation was derived.

Had another girls' night out with Pupi to watch the match between Spain and Ireland. The England vs Denmark match last night was way better! In fact, Pupi and I were more amused by the sports commentator's remarks. He said corny lines like "People in Spain are probably glued to their TVs right now. People in Ireland are probably glued to their TVs too". Duh. It was heartbreaking to end a match with a penalty shootout. Really hate those.

Sunday, June 16, 2002

A colleague sms'd me after this afternoon's World Cup match to tell me I've won my bet in the office pool (along with 3 others). I was elated, but had no idea who was playing who and what I've bet for this match. In fact, I've yet to watch any World cup match up to then. All the bets I've made were quick random guesses during breaks inbetween meetings, so it's no wonder I've lost 7 matches so far.

Anyway, instead of going for a Japanese buffet dinner, we had a girls' night out with beer and big screen TV to catch the match between England and Denmark a few hours ago. England played very well and I found myself being impressed with David Beckham (!!!). He didn't score in the match but I thought he did a good job as the captain. I can't remember exactly, but there was this incident where he stood over and shielded one of the English players to prevent him from hitting opponent players or being hit (I can't tell which), and that scene just stuck in my head. My jc girlfriend lamented yes, but he's married to Posh Spice! Point taken.

Saturday, June 15, 2002

Just watched the film screening of Elvira Madigan. It's about how a Swedish count deserts the army and runs away with a circus tightrope walker, and their doomed love affair. My friends didn't really like it but I did, despite the melodramatic overtones. When the movie starts, the couple has already started their escape together. I kept waiting for a flashback to the beginning when they met, to be informed about how they met and fell in love. But there was no flashback. There must have been lots of obstacles since he's married with 2 children, and yet he chose to abandon his family and commit treason just for her. Likewise, she chose to flee with him on a journey where they could only depend on each other, with no one else. But what made them do it? Why why why.

Word nugget of the day. The word Cholera has a meaning akin to "Shit!" in Poland.

zarchon9 has just described me as sanguine. Hmm. According to www.dictionary.com's definition, it means:

sanĀ·guine Pronunciation Key (snggwn)
adj.
1.
a. Of the color of blood; red.
b. Of a healthy reddish color; ruddy: a sanguine complexion.
2. [Archaic]
a. Having blood as the dominant humor in terms of medieval physiology.
b. Having the temperament and ruddy complexion formerly thought to be characteristic of a person dominated by this humor; passionate.
3. Cheerfully confident; optimistic.

Friday, June 14, 2002

Baking analogy at work today. In order to generate sales, folks are roping in strange pastry orders like curry puffs and doughnuts. When I pointed out that we only know how to bake cakes, the reply is of cos curry puffs are similar to cakes... both also can eat right? You worry too much, anything sure can one!

This is why I can't do sales. Too much lying is involved.

Thursday, June 13, 2002

When it comes to compatibility, I believe there are three vital questions a girl can ask to save herself a lot of trouble later on. The first is, what's your favourite painting? The second, if you could hijack a plane and fly anywhere in the world, where would you go this afternoon? The third (and possibly the clincher), if you knew that you wouldn't get caught, how would you dispose of your least favourite ex?
- extract from Chris Manby's short story Art Lover

In this story, the protagonist's favourite painting is one painted by Roy De Forest in 1972 called "Country Dog Gentlemen". Why? Cos she thought: But the best part is the blue-nosed, red-eyed collie to the right of the picture. He was disqualified from those sheepdog Olympics, "One Man and His Dog", for taking performance enhancing drugs. It's terrifying, compelling and completely incomprehensible. The man who tells me he loves "Country Dog Gentlemen" can have my virginity on the spot...

So I have no choice but to track the painting down.

Lost 4 bets in the office World Cup betting pool already. I don't have a system for betting and I wonder if I'll win any at the end of it all.

Last evening I dropped by the mobile bookfair after work and saw a couple of books I wanted to get. Stopped myself and went to the library and borrowed those exact books instead right afterwards. Came home with the library books and mum couldn't understand why I borrowed more books when I already have so many unread ones at home. Well mum, other people's books are always more urgent. :)

Wednesday, June 12, 2002

...Do you know what touched me most last night? When you said: "No one phones unless they've got a toothache." Know that I'm here, like you, am glad to see you, have some things that belong to you.
- Ned Rorem, The Paris Diary & the New York Diary (1951 - 1961)

This means I still haven't finished reading his diaries but what I mean to say is, I have the same sentiments. To those friends whom I haven't really kept in contact with and absurdly, gets more updates on me from my blog than me personally.. know that I'm still thinking of you. Call me before I call you ok? :)

Seems like folks have been enquiring about Stephen Wolfram's book A New Kind of Science at Borders. When I asked the counter staff on Tuesday night, she took one look at the title and said it's not in yet. Wow. Who are the other seekers of this monster tome?

While my UK travel mate and I were walking to the busstop, we noticed our bus just arrived while we were still a fair distance away.
The dear woman asked for the probability we could overtake the bus and board it.
I replied that if time travel is possible in our lifetime.
And someone offered her a chance to travel in time.
And she chose to go back to this current moment.
So she could achieve the satisfaction of boarding that bus.
Then yes, it is possible.

But in this present time, no we didn't make it.

Tuesday, June 11, 2002

Lesson learnt this morning at 12:03 am... earrings have to be removed for cleaning to remove gunk built up. No matter if ears aren't infected or earrings are pure, and in spite of time needed to locate your earholes to put the earrings back. Cos gunk will build up despite the best intentions.

Today I realise how ridiculous I've become in my bid to utilise time to work. I was brushing my teeth during lunch and talking about work. At the same time.

Monday, June 10, 2002

I wanted to see who's really going to follow me to the ends of the earth.
- DJ Shadow, on the music of his latest album The Private Press

I haven't sampled it yet and somehow, I can't seem to imagine how extreme it can sound to fit a sentence like that.

Bad news is when my internal laptop modem dies (it's the 2nd one!).
Good news is I still have an external spare modem I can use to dial up.

Cheap thrill is subscribing to Zouk Club so I can get club flyers mailed directly to my home instead of picking them up when I go clubbing. :)

A confession to Pupi. I realise I'm not the ideal sort of travelmate. When there's someone around, I like to take the backseat, get lazy and less alert. I have these odd compulsions to dash in every bookstore and music store and park myself there given every opportunity. Taking pics of people is something I really suck at and I know it. I'm aware staying with me in close proximity takes a lot of patience, so thanks so much for yours. :) And thanks for finding my ID ring back. I really can't thank you enough for not giving up on searching for it... that ring's been with me for so many years. I guess we understand each other better now though we've known each other for so long, isn't it strange? There are always other trips we can take! (though not for me this year)

Now I've got 41 unread office emails left, and I don't give a damn about anything except disappearing home so I'll do just that.
I'm going home!

I have exactly 743 unread office emails now and I've already cleared 200+. Working late tonight to clear them since I'm scheduled for meetings every day for the rest of this week. Joined the office betting pool for World Cup scores. Predicted it'll be 2-1 for Korea vs USA but lost my bet. Well, there are still other matches to go. Probably the last one to lock up tonight but I still feel ok. A break really helps.

It's a funny thing to be educated - but nothing compared to the dizzying experience of owning six new dresses.
- Jean Webster, Daddy-Long-Legs

2 nights ago I impulsively threw away my hoard of ticket stubs from every movie/ concert/ play I've ever attended. And it doesn't mean anything. I wonder why I bothered.

Tsunami of office emails still coming in. The tear-daily Dilbert calendar in the office is stuck at March 20. The new colleague who's supposed to join in my absence didn't make it after all. Everyone's talking about World Cup in the office. Someone sent me a pack of cactus seeds in the promotional flyer among my office snail-mail correspondence.

Time to focus on work folks! :)

Sunday, June 09, 2002

Just before she drove me to the airport for my flight, I told her I didn't look forward to the long journey home. I wished we could just teleport ourselves instead and she laughed, Like beam me up Scotty? And she carried on to narrate to me two Robert Silverberg sci-fi stories along this vein of teleportation/ time travel. We got to the airport with plenty of time to spare, but I made a mistake and queued in the wrong queue cos everyone seemed to be in this really long snaking line. She stayed with me all the time, keeping me company. We realised later it's the wrong queue, and she felt a bit upset for me that I've waited unnecessarily cos of the terrible layout of the airport. And I got into the right queue, but then there was no coming out of that to meet her when I was done. So we yelled our farewells over 2 roped-off areas. I didn't even hug her and I wanted to.

It's so good to meet you again. You look wonderful, you are wonderful. I'm just so glad.

I bought a ring from every location we've travelled to: an amber ring in Warsaw; a mood ring in Krakow; a rosary ring in Budapest; and a bird ring in Prague (though Pupi insists that the bird looks like a banana, lol). I don't have enough fingers to wear all the rings I own.. still lack rings for my thumbs and little fingers.

Amber ring. Cos I don't own any yet.

Mood ring. It's not the first I've ever acquired but I never really understood how it works... till I found this explanation. Sounds more like a portable thermometer than a mood gauge though, and I guess the ring will normally be dark blue in this hot weather.

Rosary ring. Pupi and I bought identical rosary rings though we're not Catholics. 10 tiny knobs and a little figure of Mary dot the circumference of the ring, and one is supposed to rotate the ring while praying, in lieu of rosary beads. I think of it more like an awareness ring. Like when in anger, you can press the ring hard into your palm and let the pain stem the negative thoughts. Sounds a bit sado masochistic doesn't it?

Bird copper ring. 4 years ago on my first visit to Prague, I bought my cat copper ring on the Charles Bridge. This visit I returned to look for the stall that sold the cat ring, but I didn't find it. Found a similar stall though, and bought a bird ring for remembrance. I'm doubtful that I will return to Prague a third time.

Almost all the science that's been done for the past three hundred or so years has been based in the end on the idea that things in our universe somehow follow rules that can be represented by traditional mathematical equations. The basic idea that underlies "A New Kind of Science" is that that's much too restrictive, and that in fact one should consider the vastly more general kinds of rules that can be embodied, for example, in computer programs.
- scientist Stephen Wolfram on his book A New Kind of Science.

Over 1200 pages but I guess ttj will be interested in getting it? :)

Saturday, June 08, 2002

I'm home. And so is my luggage. :) Woohoo!

Read lots on this trip, especially magazines while waiting to transit in Zurich (2 Cosmopolitan and a Harper's Bazaar). The Harper's Bazaar was quite bizarre. It's priced at US$3.50 so since I've got US dollars on me, I tried to pay this exact amount. The counter girl told me no no, it's actually 9.90 Swiss Francs, which translate to US$6.70 instead. Eh? This is outrageous! (But I succumbed anyway... boredom is more potent).

Wrote quite a bit too. In fact, I ran out of writing material on the flight home and ended up writing on the air sickness bag. No impetus to blog all that down since it's already been written though, and that is most important isn't it?

Came home, unpacked, showered, recharged all my electronic gadgets (including my Palm V which drained itself though I didn't bring it along on this trip). Lots to do but can't bring myself to do them yet. Think I'll edit my travel pics and video clips much later.

Good to be home. :)

Monday, June 03, 2002

We're now freezing our butts off in Budapest, Hungary. We took the sleeper train here from Krakow, Poland. Got woken up at 2am, 2.40am and 6am respectively by passport control. Now Pupi and I are parking ourselves at an internet cafe in Hungary. The sun's shining but then when the wind blew, man, I wished I was back in sunny Singapore. Budapest is gorgeous. So gorgeous in fact we're spending an extra day here instead of going to Slovakia. :)

Saturday, June 01, 2002

Polish music. So far I've bought albums by Polish groups Blue Cafe and Myslovitz. Former is hip hop and latter is post-rock. The store assistant compared Myslovitz to Oasis and grimaced. I bought the album anyway. lol.

Kindness is letting someone access internet before you when there's only one terminal. Thanks pupi. :)

Auschwitz was surreal. Outside was bright sun and tourists herded round quiet green lush fields. Inside was gruesome proof of how methodical cruelty could be. I just couldn't seem to connect them.