I can pinpoint the moment of realisation that we can't FUBAR anymore to the moment you lost me at Mustafa. I suggested going there for late night shopping, and had you keep my wallet and handphone cos your clothes had more pockets. You bumped into an acquaintance there and the 2 of you had a long conversation, and I wandered away out of sight. Occasionally I'd glance back in your direction but you'd still be chatting, so I found a foldable canvas fishing chair in the basketball section and sat down. A couple was there picking a soccer ball, and the guy demonstrated how he could flick the ball onto his foot and balance it there. Another 2 guys came along and asked for a basketball that glows. Or maybe I misheard them.

When I stood up again, I found you were no longer at your original spot. I retraced my steps to look for you but you weren't around. It was then that I heard you call my name. I turned and you looked so anxious cos you thought you've lost me, and you were nearly going to report me lost at the counter (and if you did, you'd claim I was your little daughter to hasten the staff to broadcast a message for me).

And strange as it may sound, we knew then that we can't deal with losing each other. That the best way we can have each other for keeps is as friends, and there's too much at risk if we FUBAR.

I want to have you for keeps.